This is actually a post from yesterday. I got sidetracked and saved it but never actually posted it.
I've never felt like I do now. My mind is going in a million different directions and I just can't keep up with everything. I think that may be what is ultimately taking such a hard toll on my body. Here I am 2 weeks of spotting and can't tell what the heck is going on with my period. I've never been in this position and I feel stupid. I've called my doctor but he is out of town until Monday. Hopefully the nurse calls back and can at least ease my mind. I don't understand why when everything is finally lined up to start IUI it all seems to go so wrong. Is this a sign that I shouldn't be trying to get pregnant? Or is something worse going on that I haven't discovered? All I know is I feel like I'm going to have a breakdown. I had a mini breakdown this morning and just sobbed for a good 30 minutes. It felt good to cry but the pain is still there. I wish I could escape the world for a few days. I know it's not possible but a girl can dream. Dreams are all I seem to have now. Hopelessly waiting for them to come true and being disappointed time and time again. I guess that's part of life.
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